Keeping my eyes open to glimpses of God

Friday, October 21, 2011

Just a Few Moments

Every time I hear that song "Better is One Day in Your Courts" I always think, "Hmm, only one day?" I've always thought that one day just isn't enough. I would want more. I've thought about it in a need-to-have-it kind of way.

Today, though, that song struck me anew. I've been in a bit of a spiritual funk lately. I'm thinking about God, and I'm praying from time-to-time, but I'm just not feeling that closeness that I usually do. And, I realize it's my fault. As I've gotten busier with work and schoolwork and joining a new small group, the first thing to go has been my intentional time with God--journaling, reading, praying, singing. It drifted slowly away, piece by piece, until it was nearly non-existent.

Yesterday, I felt anxious all day. I was making snap judgments in my head, and getting irritated with people a little too quickly. Now, I am pretty tired. I have been a little sleep deprived this week. But, I knew the real cause was something else--my lack of intimate time with God.

So I took some time last night (honestly about 10 or 15 minutes) and I read just one chapter out of 2 Corinthians. I sat and pondered the verses, asking God what his message for me might be. I feel he pointed out to me the verse about being a fragile clay jar holding the amazing light of God--that I am so fragile and capable of nothing on my own, and it is only his light and power within me that allows me to do anything right or well. I felt such relief with that reminder. I am weak, but God, you're not, and you use vessels like me to do your work. Thank you, Lord.

This morning I awoke refreshed and feeling much more myself than I have in a long time. And that song came to mind. "Better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere." I get it now. Just a few moments spent in intimacy with God has changed the rest of my week. Just a few moments with God was the best part of my entire day. Just a few moments with God is so amazing and sustaining, that all else pales in comparison. No, strike that; it all but disappears in comparison.